I have wanted to walk a prayer labyrinth for a long time. There are a couple in town (that I know of – maybe there are more than a couple), but they aren’t conveniently located, and time is not a commodity I have in excess. But, one of the rhythms in our ministry is an annual personal retreat day. This is a full workday (or you can go the night before and make it 24 hours if you want) that is entirely for the purpose of spiritual retreat. There are very few rules for this retreat day – three, to be precise:
- You cannot stay at home.
- You cannot be in the office.
- What you do has to be focused on your personal spiritual growth and soul care.
Almost a year ago, on my first of these retreat days, I went to St. Columba’s Episcopal Retreat Centre. It’s a huge campus (like 145 acres or something) just north of town that has retreat space for large groups, day camp areas for kids, and 2 small hermitages in the woods for personal retreats. The hermitages are small but adequate, and relatively comfortable. There’s a full-size bed, table and chair, prayer kneeler, 2 rocking chairs on the screened-in porch, a kitchenette and bathroom. Last fall I went only for the day, and it was cool and rainy – perfect for the fireplace I discovered in the little cabin – stocked with firewood. This time, I went for a full day, leaving the night before. Ruth Haley Barton recommends always starting your retreat in the evening, giving yourself time to settle in and allowing yourself to wake up when your body is ready, rather than to an alarm. That’s what I did on this retreat, and I concur with her assessment on the benefits of this practice.
This year, I wanted to go when the weather was nicer, and I particularly wanted to find the labyrinth. Labyrinths have been used for centuries for meditative prayer, or just quiet reflection on the spiritual journey. I’ve never used a labyrinth, and while I don’t suppose there is a “wrong” way to do it (except maybe running through it wildly??), I did read up on it in my book “Handbook of Spiritual Disciplines” before going. And I want to say, that it did not disappoint. Perhaps it was the setting, nestled in a glade of trees, in what would have been perfect silence except for the mower a little ways away, and the cicadas (which are truly my favorite sound of summer!). Perhaps it was the stone altar and tall cross at the end of the glade which faces you as you exit the labyrinth. Perhaps it was the perfect (for me) temperature and the sunlight filtering through the sweet gum leaves. But whatever it was, it was a place of peaceful reflection.
I asked the Lord what He would want to show me or say to me in this place. And here are a few reflections.
Sometimes life seems to be going in circles. But it’s not. There is a purpose – a destination. It is holiness. It is the Center – Jesus. He is the destination.
During the journey of life, sometimes you find yourself in places that seem far from the Center. Keep journeying. Because if your desire is for Him, the path leads to Him. Living a life that is centered on Christ is not linear. It winds around, sometimes feeling near Him, and sometimes feeling far. But He hasn’t moved. There are times in a labyrinth when you are very near the center of the labyrinth by proximity, but not by journey. Conversely, there are times that you are very near the center by linear journey, but not by proximity. Just as God is not bound by time, He is not bound by the winding of your journey either. He is always near – whether He seems to be or not.
Apparently purple is God’s favorite color too! I knew I had that right!! 🙂
Even things which are bent can highlight the cross. Because indeed, this is not how this sweet gum tree was meant to grow. But the arc of its bent and weary trunk frames the altar and the cross as a thing of beauty and grace, not disfigurement. When you feel weary and weighed down and bent over by the burdens of this broken world – frame the cross. Highlight the sacrifice of Jesus and the grace that is solely responsible for your very being.
Transformation takes time. And it isn’t pretty. There is really nothing beautiful in a cocoon, a chrysalis, or even in a newly released butterfly. But give it time, and it will spread its wings and show the good design of the Creator. That is true for us too. We are transformed slowly. And the process is not pretty. But just like the butterfly, one day we will spread our wings, and fly on the wind of the Spirit, displaying His glory in us and in our amazing change from a belly-crawling caterpillar to a beautiful, graceful, flying work of art.